1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My fist

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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Nick Cannon

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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why was the monster truck late to the rally.. because it had no driver

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? When buying African American Slaves the masters often sought attributes that would be useful for manual labor such as agricultural work. The slaves who met these criteria had more chances to pass on their better, more beneficial genetic info via sexual intercourse with other slaves. Through many generations the most beneficial traits such as fine motor control in the phalanges and overall strength were passed down. This is very similar to Darwin's Theory of Evolution.

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Why did the other Albino cross the road? He was running away from a witch doctor who was going to brutally murder him and steal his body parts.

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Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

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A man is lonely and calls a hooker. She goes to his house, pleasures him, and then demands 42 million dollars. The man shoots the whore and throws her body into a river.

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

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What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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