What is the difference between two little red cubes who are excactly the same in weight lengt colour etc. ??? One is actually a blue ball!

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What did the dog say to the cat? I have no idea. I wasn't there.

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

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Cancer.

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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What would happen if you threw 50 plates off of your roof? Nothing. No one in their right mind would do that. Besides, who owns 50 plates?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know where i was going with this one.... Refrigerator

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A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

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There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

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Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

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What is the hardest part about rollerblading? Most commonly the balance part.

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Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

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Basically copying you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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