Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

People just dont care about me, yesterday I got a coconut in my head and... AWWWW thats horrible! Yeah I... So did the coconut make it?

a blonde walks into a drycleaning store to get her clothes and on her way out the empoyee behind her says come again and then the blonde says shut up u nosy bitch its just toothpaste this time!!!

Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? a pharmacist

Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

Apple juice.

Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

What's white, black and can't fly? Nothing important.

An Arab walks into a bar. He then blows up the bar.

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

Q: Why doesn't the young lady speak very much? A: Because she's a whore

Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

Why is it hot outside? Because God made it so.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

Why did the creator of Anti-Joke.com make the website? Because he probably wanted to promote his book and make more money.

Why did the man punch the women? I don't know, but he served jailtime

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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