Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Passing by

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

there are two muffins in an oven. one says "its getting hot in here". the other says " oh my gosh!!! its a talking muffin!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

thumb_up thumb_down +22

“Knock knock” “Who's there?” “Jesus” “Jesu.............wait, REALY?” “No,Jesus is currently "dead".”

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what do you call a retarded italian Niko

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

My mum is called Steve

thumb_up thumb_down +6

LO AND BEHOLD!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Did you hear the one about the guy who couldn't tell any funny jokes? He went to Anti Joke and posted 1000's.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do blacks run away from whites? Because god told all people to never go to the light.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

DON'T LOOK A GIFT HORSE IN THE MOUTH BECAUSE HORSES HAVE BAD BREATH

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops