How much seamen does a gay guy have??? A whole butt load.

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Where di mary go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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What does the Christian celebrate on Christmas? Christmas

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An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

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Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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What's worse than 1000 babies stapled to one tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 tress.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he was dead

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Religious fanatics: WE MUST NOT SIN! Jesus: And I died for their sins? They do not even try a bit of sex and rock and roll? Now that is a sin :( I died for nothing then :( Religious fanatics: Damn!

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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Democracy.

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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