Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

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I walked a few Km from home.. Something stops me in my tracks, there lies A LIE!

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What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

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well the duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man, running the stand "quack" then went on its way

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

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Hi.

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Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Wenn Sie dies zu übersetzen, dann ist dein ein Esel

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How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

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Why did the samurai commit Sepuku? Because it is an honorable Japanese tradition.

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Joe Biden

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Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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Yeah? You like that? Its like art for some.

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what glows blue and howls at the moon at midnight? I dont know but i had sex with your mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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