three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: why was the man punched in the face? A: I did like him.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why didn't the black man finish high school? He overdosed on heroin.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

This is a random Anti joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's better than winning $500? Using it to support the Islams to destroy America

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the bear go into the woods to get shot

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Mexican, a Caucasian, and an African-American jump out of an airplane. They all die.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down -20

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops