What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

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What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

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Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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Why was the old lady sad? Her husband was raped by an angry gallon of milk.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 went to a house party. 7 was there. 7 and 6 kind of new each other. They went to the same school, but weren`t really friends. All night 7 was giving 6 strange looks. 6 started feeling uneasy, so he left the party early. When 6 got in his car 7 was inside waiting for him and pulled out a gun. Luckily 6 got away from 7 safely, but has been scared of him ever since.

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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This is an anti- joke

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What did the old man get for Christmas? He forgot because he has alzheimer's

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

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why did the chicken cross the road who's there and the man died of cancer congradulations! your preganant

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

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What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

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What happens when a Jew, a black man, and a Latino walk into the bar? The potential for racial humor.

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the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

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shea kisses a girl

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Chris Bosh's neck

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Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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