A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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PSN IS UP

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What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

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Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

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Caller: Is your fridge running! Callee: ... umm yes? Caller: I guess you don't need my services. Thanks Callee: ok bye

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Interupting black lady! Interupti. MMMMHHHHMMMM!!!!

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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What do you get when you cross North Korea and the boston marathon? BOMBS! :(

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Nobody know he couldn't open it.

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A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

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You know what's funny about AIDS? Nothing.

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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47

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What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

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what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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