What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

its funny cuz i laughed!

Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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