What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

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A chicken crosses the road as a car comes by. The driver pumps the brakes and stops the car just before hitting the chicken. The chicken crosses the road safely. Onward, my noble steed !

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

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what is worse than finding a worm in your apple being tricked by your best friend to mule drugs over the boarder and then imprisoned in a Vietnamese jail, where you will most likely will be traded for sex and other horrid act of sodomy, only to escape and work as a sex slave to earn your way home, because that is the life you know now there is no way out you will die here.

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What's the difference between a zebra and a newspaper? Everything.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Sam alexander is also r8 g4y

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If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

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A group of teenage boys put a flaming bag of dog feces on Old Man Howard's doorstep. He came out and demanded that they stop such behavior at once. They did, and the day went on normally.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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Where are the first Cannibals in the Bible? A. 2 Corinthians 8:1

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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Two jewish men walk into the butcher shop. They buy a pound of ground beef and nothing else.

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A: knock knock B: the door is open, why don't you come right in?

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gesss what happen u promis not to tell anyone ok this is what happen !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOTHING

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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Why was little Timmy so fast? Because he's tied up in the trunk of a speeding car.

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what did reed read? the most recent anti-joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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