What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Why did the Asian man go into space? Because he was an astronaut.

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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What is the difference between a woman and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is the most common term for adult females of the human race.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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who looks like a double rainbow? gun baby who was pregant and rapes her

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black.

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

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What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

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What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

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Q: Why does a hamburger doesn't taste like an ice cream? A: Because.

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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