Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

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What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

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How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

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Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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what did the wall say to the floor? nothing interior structure supports do not talk

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Who are doctors and literally are porn stars

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A racist walks into a bar. Nasty accident you had there mate. You should be more careful next time.

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Hey, the eighties called, they were really excited about inventing a phone that could call the future.

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What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

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What's worse than finding mold on your cheese? Getting Raped

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Q:why did the lion eat the zebra? A: because it was hungry.

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Look whos talking Matt Critchley

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he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

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What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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