What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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Why did the little boy drop his lollipop? He got hit by a car.

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A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

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The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

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What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

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why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

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What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

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How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

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Why did the woman pay $5,000 for a gallon of milk? She didn't. She paid $2.99.

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Men's Rights

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What did the boy do before school? Jacked off.

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Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

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whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops