A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

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Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

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Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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A mushroom walks into a bard and the bartender admonishes him and tells him to leave. The mushroom says "Aw, c'mon...you stupid jerk!"

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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What computer sings the best? A Dell? No a Mac, because they are the superior computer.

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What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

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Is that a banana in your pocket? As a matter of fact, yes it is.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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Get in the Batmobile.

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Q: Whats funnier than Ryan Vallee? A: The death of your family -RDV

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How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You don't

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what is the only death better than asama bin ladin JUSTIN BIEBER'S

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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