Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

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What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

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a brick cheated on another brick, the brick that was cheated on was angry and became disgusted at the brick that cheated. the current brick that was cheated on tryied top kill the other bitch brick, the brick that cheated tried to break up the fight but testicles

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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Lol you respond here goood one AAANDEEERS TEN MG PER PILL Asswhipe! Besides friends call me Black Metal, you can call me Nero the avenger. Line kinda broke up with you first, you think she would send you a picture with my finger on her... cough... AND THINK YOU WOULD STILL STIck aROUND WITH HER? Id be more... well glad for your mothers sake, btw, she got me flowers, I wont tell the rest, but she got me another pic... Okay ill tell the rest then, first pic is my fingas, the other is my limpo in her mouth... The third is the funny doctor which caught us and wanted all three of us to be on the pic... Aww, no really man, you had a gem, we where good friends before me and Line, but she did not want to leave before she got me flowers... Aww... Ooooh... Oh! Well not yet but you get the picutre. I got ur message, sure im high as a kite, but I know what im doing if you can "picture" what I mean... Dont tell your mom btw, I want to surprise her, (reverse psychology) hmm, that did I write that? Anyway, how is your sister doing? I dont think she gives those strangely long hugs to anyone but me, and she laughed wen i got a boner... NERO, never call me, never ever call Me black, besides its either Mr.Black, oor black metla you rat! VALIUM? SERIOUSLY? Ill get that test extended you know... Because POISONING!

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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What do you say to a jew with blood on his leg? Are you okay?

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i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

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Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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What's funny about cheese? Nothing.

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What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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