In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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Q: A boy went to 7-11 and bought Coke instead of 7up. Why? A: I don't know

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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What do you call a man in the desert? Whatever his name is.

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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a man walks into a bar, he is injured severely and needs medical attention stat, he is rushed to the hospital where he dies that evening

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How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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a horse walks into a bar. what does the bartender say? why is there a horse in my bar.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

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Whats brown,looks like a.dike,and is a whore. Marcella

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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Type 17 diabetes. Hepatitis R. Pubic Lice. Just Pubic Lice.

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I like Pi. It can make circles.

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What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

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hey guys im gay

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

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