What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

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Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

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What did the genie say to the frog? Go home.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What's brown and slimy? brown slime

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is plastic and dangerous to children. The other holds groceries.

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Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

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Q: Why can't Eric drive a car? A: Because Eric is a rock

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An Asian with a big dick.

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Women's rights.

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Why was the potatoe hot Cuz I cooked it

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Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

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there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

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fart+fart=poop

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Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

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What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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Robin, get in the batmobile.

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Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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