- Anti Joke

why was the man so good at holding stuff? he was born with 4 arms!

If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The white man who called the police and the police officers involved were sued by the family for a large sum of money.

Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

There was 3 guys. A mexican, a black guy, and a jew. They work at a construction site and one day they found what appears to be a magic lamp. The mexican guy rubs the lamp hoping for a genie to appear and grant them wishes. Sure enough a genie appears. "I have been freed from the magic lamp." Says the genie "I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The mexican guy did not understand english. The jew steals the lamp and the black guy stabs him. The next day a blonde goes to the crime scene. He spot the magic lamp on the floor, picks it up, and rubs it. The genie appears. "I have been freed from the lamp. I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The blonde says "I wish Jose could speak ad understand english." Suddenly, the mexican appears and says "Thank you."

what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

hey i just met you.. and this is crazy. but here my facebook so add me maybe!!

Why was the black guy in jail He was a jail guard

Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

There was once a boy who ate fire. He died of severe burns.

what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

knock knock. Who's there... Mormans

Why did the carpenter cry? Somebody killed his family.

What's black, white, and hungry? The population of Zimbabwe.

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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