The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

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Once upon a time Jimmy was walking home from school. Jimmy was then confronted by a a pedophile so he suddenly ate himself.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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what is big round and fat? Your MOM

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Why didn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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Get it? More.

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So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A; On the other side was another beautiful looking chicken who he plans to marry and raise a family with.

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

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What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

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a horse walks into a bar except it wasn't a horse it was Sarah Jessica Parker

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Your mom is like a tire iron: she's a whore

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Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

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Why does it take 7 years for Harry Potter to kill Voldemort? Voldemort is a very powerful wizard and Harry Potter is just learning magic at the beginning so he is not prepared to fight him.

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25.

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops