I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have cancer."

So a black man steals a bike Because it was unlocked, and that was just poor planning.

What's worse than being a jew in the holocaust Being born black

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One jew to screw in the light bulb.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

why did the boy poop his pants Yhe Holocaust

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

JOHN to MARY: Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet So are you MARY to JOHN: Roses are red Violets are blue Who are you? JOHN to MARY: Roses are red I'm your husband MARY to JOHN: No! JOHN to MARY: WHAT??? MARY to JOHN: Ex Awkward silence. Mary moves out the next day.

What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

Who is the fastest man on earth? To get to the other side.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

Are you Drew?

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and one in the evening? A dog that plays in traffic all day.

What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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