Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

Womens Rights. Excist in nearly every country on Earth today.

What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

Wenn Sie dies zu übersetzen, dann ist dein ein Esel

Once, I went to Peru.

How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to go well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that when his wife was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas, despite that the tank was full and she only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrendous car accident that caused the fuel to empty and catch fire. Mary survived but their 6 month old baby was killed.

Why did the black man fall down? A guy pushed him.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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