A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

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If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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Bob fell off his roof.

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Penis.

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Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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69

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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