Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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Get in the car.

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What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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