Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

69

What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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