when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

thumb_up thumb_down +143

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why Does God Hate Gays? He Doesent, God Does Not Exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the disabled man fall of the swing, someone shot him.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

thumb_up thumb_down -111

Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

thumb_up thumb_down -131

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

thumb_up thumb_down +170

What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops