Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

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Mexicans are like waffles

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I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

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Why did the moron jump through the window?

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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