In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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You copy and paster!

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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1,984

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JUSTIN BIEBER IS A FAG

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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