How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to end the lives of two male individuals and paralyze the the third male individual from the hip down.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It can never be certain, as chickens are incapable of communicating.

Why did the chicken cross the road... He wanted to get away from all those jerks who kept asking him why he made the decisions that he did. he later committed suicide...

Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

Three moose were in the middle of the road. They were then shot by a maniac hunter.

Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? Because he is dead

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

What happens when you throw a green stone into the red sea? It gets wet.

Whats worse than not coming up with an original anti joke? Nothing.

Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

A man walks into a bar, and he says, "ow,".

"KNOCK KNOCK". I opened the door to greet my guests for the party.

What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

Justin Bieber got laid

What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

A little boy ran to the pool to see how long he could hold his breath. He slipped and fractured his skull.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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