What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

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What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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whats dead and gone your nanas cat

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Whats funnier than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple

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What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

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What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

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If you don't see any banners here, it doesn't mean they aren't here.

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Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

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How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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What does Santa do on Halloween? He gives out candy to the kids who come to his door.

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Here is an opposite. Black Santa Claus.

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Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops