Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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what do you call an ocelot with ebola? an ocelot that might die soon.

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because it's a free country chickens are free to do as they please

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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Halts Maul Reid. Das ist, was ich rede.

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Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll order The Special, what's wrong with you?

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Pineapples have a smaller volume than the sun

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What has wheels and flies? A wheel that I have altered so it can fly

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how may i help you

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Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Lettuce. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! AAAAHHHH!

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Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

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Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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