Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

tee hee

How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

Are you gay? No. Ok.

Q:Why did suzie fall off the swing A:She had no arms

Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

Your mom.

Two Poles are walking down the street. One says "Look out, I think that's dog shit." The other man thanks him and avoids the excrement.

Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

Mail | Print | Vote | Daft Punk Superheroes Lyrics Send "Superheroes" Ringtone to your Cell Songwriters: BANGALTER, THOMAS / CHRISTO, GUY MANUEL HOMEM / MANILOW, BARRY / PANZER, MARTIN Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air

leon harney ya pikey

Why did Hitler commit suicide? ... ... He committed suicide for the simple reason that the soviet and allied forces were closing in on him and he knew that he did not stand a chance of winning the war.

Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

Justin Beiber

Here's a little diddy I wrote for One Direction: Now One Direction, don't forget that we all know About the antics that you pull at your own live shows Like you take your own lyrics and give 'em a swerve Now they either make no sense or make you sound like pervs And Liam, why you swiping cameras and phones? What you need a girl's number cause you're crusin alone? And another thing, it's a frickin spoon for God's sake What did this thing impale your puppy with a giant frickin stake? And so One Direction, we now all think That in about a year, y'all are gonna go N*SYNC and disappear cause N*SYNC isn't around any...aw you know!

poo

Sticks and stones may break my bones... and my pistol will kill you.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...