What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

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why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

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Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

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What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

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What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

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Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

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Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Hit by a bus Why did the bus driver drop his coffee? He hit the boy

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your mom died.

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Billy Cundiff.

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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