Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

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Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

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Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

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What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

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What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

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Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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