Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

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whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

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ONE DAY THE SKY OPENS AND SUDDENLY Gad: Jews, you are my chosen people! Jews: YAY! GODS CHOSEN! WE ARE GONNA BATHE IN RICHES AND YOU WILL COMMAND US TO RAID AND RAPE LANDS! FOR OURSELVES! AND EVERYTHING! Gad: Eh... Well, actually I was thinking more like... Jews: YAY WE ARE GONNA CONQUER THE WORLD! GAD IS WITH US NAO! Right Gay? I mean Gad... Cough... Gad: Err, well *cough* suuure, I mean... Jews: YAY! WE ARE GADS CHOSEN! WE ARE GONNA GET MIGHTY! Moral: "You do not want to be "Gods chosen" people!" Btw, you telling me Jewsus was not a Jew? Hmm?

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Why couldn't little Johnny play sports like the rest of the kids? He was diagnosed with polio at the age of 3 and has limited use of his legs.

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Why did the girl get robbed? Because her door was unlocked.

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Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

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theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

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A convict escapes a prison he's been in for 15 years. He's soon tracked down by police and put back in jail where he'll serve another 2 years of jail time along with his 5 remaining years.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? nothing cows cant talk. They did however, exchange glances while chewing grass next to each other.

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Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

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How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

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homework

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a convicted serial killer.

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

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How old is your mom? Old.

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A kid goes to Band Camp and comes back better at the Trumpet.

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Little Davie was a kid with no arms and legs and one day his friends Came to his house and knocked on the door and asked for little Davie And asked if he wanted to come play baseball..Little Davie replied "I'd Love to but I have no arms or legs" his friends say we know that..We were Just needing a second base..

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Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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