What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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