Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

Why is your face? Because.

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

Why did the moron jump through the window?

69

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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