A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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?"what's up" "A preposition"

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops