Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

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What never seems to get old? AIDS.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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What did the boy get for creating a fantastic AntiJoke? Leukemia

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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