why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

what did the blonde mail to her boyfriend? nothing, blonde's can't write.

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

Q.why is there so much drama? A.it's a reality tv show.

ati jokes are not to be funny. what about u

Q: What's small and can't read? A: A candybar

The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

What did the gay guy get at the grocery store? A tub of Häagen-Dazs ice cream because he thought he deserved a treat.

There is a middle-eastern man in customs with a turban and a briefcase and he is profiled by his race which is a sad fact of our society.

Your mom is a whore bitchy virgin

What would Jesus do? Do? You mean like do it? You have a dirty mind.

Random Guy: "Oh god, why was I born with so much common sense?" God: "You must be mistaken, or else you wouldn't be asking me."

What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He was brutally raped and killed, Inglewood is really not a place you want your children growing up.

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a Nazi.

What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

Why couldn't Jenna play double dutch? Because she had no friends.

Q. Why does Samuel Jackson always play a black guy? A. Because he's black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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