you lose.

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

Why was the human stronger than the dog? Because the dog had four legs and a mouth and a human has 2 legs, 2 arms, and is taller. Therefore, the human has more capabilites than the dog.

can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

TOBUSCUS

one day i went to bed

i put the STD in S.T.u.D all i need is U!!! F_CK all i need is U!!!!!!! o.0 lolzzz

there was a blind kid and a man wearing a WWJD & Livstrong bracelet touched his eyes and he could see. He wasn't used to the light and walked into traffic and died instantly.

What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

knock knock Who's there? ... Hello?

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

What do people say when a dyslesic person scores a goal in soccer good job that was a nice goal

How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

A black man walks into a Ku Klux Klan meeting.

crap!!

Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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