Why did the ship crash into Italy? Because a woman took over driving it!

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Knock Knock Go Away

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Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

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im jacob, i have as much hair on my penis as mr macs head.....none.

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i may not know where you sleep. but, i spiked your drink with sleeping pills

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Your so ugly that your birth certeficate is a apology letter from the condum factory

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Pinus Testicles

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What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

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Why would you ever buy an antijoke book? BECAUSE ANTIJOKES ARE F***ING AWESOME!!!

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What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

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whats worse then getting fired from your job? Getting raped by a giant gorilla with a 4 foot long penis following by being bitten by a very poisonous rattle snake and slowly dying a painful death.

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How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

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A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

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Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

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Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

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you know what they say about men with big feet... damn you got some big feet.

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Wanna hear a great joke? (any answer) Your dad's choice of condom.

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Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm random but can still rhyme Hatsune Miku

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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Two men go hunting and one has a sudden heart attack. The other man calls 911 and immediately tells the operator his location and the nature of the emergency. Rescue workers arrive on the scene in a timely manner and the man makes a full recovery.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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