Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey. Why did the other bird fall out of the tree? It was shot. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A Jew! Bless you.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia ...where am I

thumb_up thumb_down -16

David Silberberg is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: why did the cookie go to the doctor??? A: because he was sick

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the koahla fall out of the tree? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What starts with P and ends with orn? Porn

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What does Harry Potter love? Magic

thumb_up thumb_down -18

im typkiking wifrh myv troes. Sorry, i was typing with my toes.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

So this beautiful woman goes to see her doctor and says "Doctor i think i have a fever." the doctor replies "I think I've got just what you need. open your mouth." The woman opened her mouth and the doctor gave her some Advil "This should help your fever. that will be $300." in shock the woman said "these prices are to high."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I watched The Pianist last night? Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -18

An old jewish man, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A black man rode down the street on a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the man fall of the building? Someone shot both of his kneecaps.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats the difference between black and white. Nothing they're both colors.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

69

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why are Ethiopians so fast? Because antelope are also very fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is faster than a black man with a stereo? A car

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops