Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin' with his family

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, you're entire family is dead.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

What do you call a bus filled with White, Chinese, and Black people? Public transportation.

An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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