How do you stop a Polish army on horseback? With artillery.

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whats worse than school? Summer school

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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What is green and looks like Grass? A painting of grass

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what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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roses are red, violets are violet.

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what did the dog say? dogs can't talk therefore he said nothing

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What do you call a fat indian boy Eeeeeeeh fatty boy

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What's the difference in a red sports car and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a red sports car in my garage.

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

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A man walks into a bar and brings a Snickers. He gets a beer, eats the candy, and leaves leaving the wrapper. The bartender is angry with the littering but cleans it up and serves another customer.

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sometimes i wonder why is the frisbee getting bigger? then it hits me

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket in disguise

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

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The cat climbed a tree. It didn't want to come down, so it starved to death.

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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Whats so funny? That kid has down syndrome

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What did the table say to the human? Nothing, tables don't talk.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? You've already seen this joke at least SIXTY TIMES on this website, so you already know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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