Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

How do you scare a blonde woman? Tie her up and mutilate her family while she watches.

Chinese drivers.

A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

why did the holocaust not die because black people are scared of fuck

A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

What is more worse than death? Death

What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

toast points

What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

Why did the man order fried chcken? I have twelve dead babies in my trunk.

Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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