If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

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"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

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Michael Jackson's favorite places: Toystore Candy shop Playground Amusment parks Kindergarden classroom Orphanige

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

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So tell me what’s worse than a baby? A dead baby… Well then what’s worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies? A live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies? A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

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How many beavers can you fit in one paddling pool? None; it's probably very dangerous trying

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GUESS WHAT ?????????? THATS WHAT CAOMHIN

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A Jew! Bless you.

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Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

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what?

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas?

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How many retarded mexicans can you fit in a smart car? Two.

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Two people went to a planetarium to see a movie about the solar system. They came out smarter than when they had first walked in.

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What do you call a guy with no hands working in a hat store? larry

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ow

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I'm a boy... I like hamburgers... Xbox is my favorite activity.... I have a dog... My dad is cheap... He's my doctor, my dentist, and my mom... Haha get it?

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What happened when the young boy farted. It smelled. :)

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People made fun of a plant for walking into a bar. Little did they know it hadn't been watered for days.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it followed the trail of bird feed strewn across it.

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Why did the polar bear cross the road? He didn't, there are no roads in Antarctica.

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What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

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What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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