What is worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? 1 dead babies in 10 trees.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your neighbor. I just ran over your cat.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

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How do you fit a homosexual man into a small card board box? You cut him into pieces.

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Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get in the car.

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Why do black people enjoy watermelon? Because it tastes good.

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A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

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What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

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i don't get it...none of these are funny.

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Did you hear about the guy who fell out of the stands at the ranger game? He died.

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A man walks outside on a sunny day. Since the sun was very bright, he put on a pair of sunglasses. While this was going on, nothing else really happened and he went on with his day as usual.

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

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Q: What did the peanut say to the shell? A: Its dark in here.

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What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Black people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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