Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

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How are trees and friends alike? They are both subject to fall when struck with an axe.

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How do you make bread out of corpses? You don't. You grow it with bread seeds.

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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What do Jews always complain & want money for? Anything

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have Alzheimer's, CHEESE ON TOAST

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Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

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What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

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Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

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A priest a rabbi and a minister are all standing at the gates of heaven. Us mortal beings can only conjecture what might've have taken place.

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I just can't stand sitting down!

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yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

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whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? Because he had uncontrollable muscle spasms.

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What's black and hangs from a rope on a tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

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What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

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Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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matt f stupid because no one likes him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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