Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

400 asian people walked in a bar

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

You copy and paster!

What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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