why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down +103

What never seems to get old? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

69

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops