What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

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What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

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Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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