I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

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What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

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Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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Fags are gay.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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