What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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your mom is so fat, shes not skinny

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Did the Chicken cross the road? No the road moved the chicken across.

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Why did the Jew rob the bank? -He was a criminal.

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Why did the Quantum chicken cross the road? It was already on both sides.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? This is 7, if you do everything I say, 6 will live.

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Two muffins are in the oven, One says "Damn it, so hot in here," The other one says " Wow! Muffin which can talk!"

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Whats the worst part of Chemotharapy? The Cancer.

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(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

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What did winter say to summer? Nothing. Seasons are physically incapable of speaking because they are not living things. They are simply an idea made by humans to explain why the weather changes as the sun spins around the earth.

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Whats black and white, and red all over? A: Your grandma, naturally black haired, beaten to a pulp and left pale white with blood covering the majority of her body.

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Whats worse than missing the bus? Having the short bus picking u up

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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A man walks into a bar, and spends all his money because he is an alchoholic.

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What do you call a white man in the middle of Mexico City? Dave.

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why did the walrus sex with the jew because 911 created a sexual falafel

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Yo Mama So Fat ... She Look Like Dis ///(*<>*)\\\ | | | | <=> <=>

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Where does someone who has lost his arm, has a bleeding head, is mentally ill, has strep throat, and lung cancer go? Too late, they died.

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Why didn't the girl make the basketball team? She has no arms or legs.

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Yo' mama's such a hoe she got arrested last week for prostitution charges!

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Two men walk into a bar. One gets drunk, goes home, savagely beats his wife, and goes to jail for domestic abuse.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hello Carolina, let me lick your vagina.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic with a family of four and is ruining his life. -Tag

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Two hillbillies are sitting in a van. It's friday and one of them suggests they should play a game of 20 Questions. The other one agrees. The first hillbilly thinks of the word 'donkey dick'. - Is it something you can eat? the second hillbilly asks. - Yes, the first one replies. - Is it a donkey dick? - Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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